Why Do We Stay?

I don’t think I’m the kind of guy who likes torture. Definitely not a fan of horror movies.

Yet, I think some people very close to me would ask why I continuously put myself in situations that seem to them just to be torture for me. Even worse, they see me stay in situations that seem to be self-torture, where I continue to be hurt by my own or someone else’s actions.

So, why do we stay?

In my case, I think there are several reasons. For one, I am not a big fan of change.

Sure, I like to say and even think that I enjoy change because it can bring new opportunities and new adventures. But if I’m being honest, change is hard and often scary.

Going into the unknown seems so much more worse usually then staying in the known and perhaps comfortable, even though it’s bad.

Some of my friends and family may challenge that I stay in these situations because I don’t value myself very much. In other words, I don’t believe I deserve better.

I think I am making progress in this area. While I have a long way to go, I do feel that I am valuing myself more.

So maybe the important question isn’t why we stay in these situations. Instead, maybe it’s how do we leave these situations because we’re awesome and totally worth it?

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