‘Was Not Unexpected’

It was not unexpected.

Those are the words from the sister of Kate Spade after her tragic death. While there’s some controversy surrounding her comments, the words hit home for me.

With my own situation, quite long before I sought help for myself, those close to me tried to help me see that things could be better. Not necessarily that they were wrong, but that they could be better.

I wish they would have pushed harder. Perhaps she hid behind a smile.

A very close friend and I were having a conversation about this and he pushed back that sometimes you can only do so much to help someone who is hurting and does not want help.

While I appreciate the rawness of this viewpoint, I very strongly disagree. I do, however, agree that it is going to very likely be a tough situation and the battle may be intense.

When someone is hurting so badly they feel like the only hope is to escape from this life and all they know, they likely seem very closed off and unreceptive to help.

In my own personal experience, this could not have been further from the truth. Oh how I wanted someone to step in and help me.

While I ultimately had to help myself, someone strong coming alongside you makes you feel stronger and not alone. They probably don’t understand your exact feelings or situation, but there’s a major comfort in that person walking alongside you.  

This is a major component of the Suicide Prevention Lifeline’s #BeThe1To campaign, aimed at actions anyone can take to help prevent suicide.

Let’s take their cue and offer each other three h’s: healing, help and hope.


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